HAMASIKA

Fertility Success Stories

Ilana's Story

Ilana Portway
Home: Lakeville, Minnesota
Children: Madeline Abigail, 4, and Robert Henry, 5 months

by Connie Matthissen

When she was trying to get pregnant with her first child, Ilana Portway was diagnosed with "unexplained infertility." She was 30 when she began trying, and it took nearly two years, fertility drugs, and an intrauterine insemination (IUI) procedure before she became pregnant with Madeline, now 4 years old.

When Ilana, who works as finance manager for a large corporation, and her husband, Julian, decided to try again, they figured that they'd have a similar experience the second time around. "We were optimistic starting out, because we got pregnant after the first IUI the first time," says Ilana. "But by then I was 34 years old and considered to be of 'advanced maternal age'— it's an awful, awful term, isn't it? So my doctor decided to be more aggressive."

Ilana sounds like a physician when she recounts her infertility treatment regime: "Three months of Clomid, a hysterosalpingogram, laparoscopy, and hysteroscopy, then an aggressive series of ovulation drugs with IUI. I took drugs to grow as many eggs as possible, other drugs to slow the growth down to give as many eggs as possible a chance to reach maturity, and still more drugs to maximize the growth of the eggs. I took progesterone to thicken the lining of the uterus. When the eggs were at their maximum maturity, I took an hCG shot to release the eggs and more progesterone and waited the cycle out."

"One drug I took made me crazy -- I was ready to murder my husband. You look at yourself and don't recognize who you've become."

Some of the fertility drugs she was taking had disturbing side effects. "They really do a number on you," says Ilana. "One drug I took made me crazy. I was ready to murder my husband. You look at yourself and don't recognize who you've become."

Fertility drugs are expensive, too, and many insurance plans don't cover the costs. "I'll never forget the time I drove up to the drive-through window at the pharmacy to pick up some medication, and the bill was $600!" Ilana recalls.

After she underwent four IUI procedures with no success, Ilana asked her doctor for a prescription for antidepressants. "I was embarrassed to ask, but my doctor was actually relieved," she says. "She told me she often prescribes antidepressants for people going through infertility treatment, because the experience is so difficult."

Last year, after 18 months of fertility drugs and IUI, Portway and her husband decided to take a break over the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. Their doctor recommended that they try IVF next, and they wanted to think it over before making a decision.

But after her first cycle without any fertility interventions, Ilana discovered she was pregnant. "We couldn't believe it," she says. "We don't know if it was due to some residual effect of all the drugs, or whether just taking it easy and forgetting about getting pregnant was what did the trick." Last July, Ilana gave birth to a little boy, Robert Henry.

It helps to find things to laugh about if you can, says Ilana, reflecting on her experience. "I had to have a shot in my butt every month, and my husband was too chicken to do it. So I had to go to my neighbor's house, and she'd give me the shot. The running joke on our street was that her husband hoped to take over the job when she was out of town. If you can find humor in the situation, it helps keep you going."

Ilana and her husband hope to have one more child, but if it doesn't work out, she says, they're happy with what they have: "I feel so lucky to have a girl and a boy. My husband and I love being parents. Like any mother, I'm convinced I have the most beautiful, brilliant, talented children in the world."

Source: http://www.babycenter.com

HAMASIKA

Fertility Success Stories

Zannyha's Story

Zannyha Martell
Home: Birmingham, Alabama
Child: 12 months

by Connie Matthissen

The first time Zannyha Martell became pregnant, it was a complete surprise. "We weren't even trying," she recalls. "I was 25, and I didn't feel ready to have a child. I thought, 'Wait, I'm too young to have a baby!'"

Zannyha, who moved to the United States from Mexico when she was a teenager, had what she calls a "perfect pregnancy" and an easy delivery — until the last minute, when her baby went into fetal distress and was born dead. "They couldn't find anything wrong," says Zannyha. "They think she may have choked on some phlegm."

After losing their baby, Zannyha and her husband, Miguel, decided to wait before trying again. Three years later, when they decided they were ready, Zannyha couldn't seem to get pregnant.

"It put such stress on our marriage. Sex was no longer fun — my husband was like a machine to me. It was like, 'come on, it's time, get over here!'"

The fertility specialists they consulted couldn't find anything wrong with either of them. One doctor suggested that Zannyha's weight might be impeding conception, so she dropped the extra pounds but still didn't get pregnant. Over the next five years, they sold their house and cashed in their retirement plans so they could afford fertility treatments. After two IVF procedures, she still wasn't pregnant.

"It was a terrible time," Zannyha says today. "It put such a stress on our marriage. Sex was no longer fun -- my husband was like a machine in my eyes. It was like, 'Come on, it's time, get over here!'"

Finally, the fertility specialist told the couple that, even though she could find no physical reason they could not bear a child, there was nothing more she could do. "I just don't think it's going to happen," she said.

"We were very sad," says Zannyha. "But by then, we'd pretty much given up hope."

Six or seven months after they stopped fertility treatments, Zannyha went to the doctor for a checkup. She was concerned because she was tired all the time and kept bursting into tears for no apparent reason. After running several tests, her doctor told her to sit down -- and informed her that she was eight weeks pregnant.

When Zannyha's husband, Miguel, walked in the door from work, she showed him the sonogram. Miguel had come up with the idea that Zannhya had a tumor -- that was what was preventing her from getting pregnant and making her tired -- so when he saw the sonogram, he assumed it was a picture of the tumor.

"When are they going to take it out?" he asked. When she told him it was a baby in the sonogram, not a tumor, he still didn't believe it.

Zannyha now thinks that her infertility was caused at least in part by the trauma of losing her first child. "I was so afraid of going through it all again, even though it was what I wanted more than anything," she says. "The first time, it was such an easy pregnancy, and everything went perfect. But if everything was perfect, how could my baby die? And could it happen all over again?"

Perhaps because she'd tried so hard and for so long, when she finally got pregnant, Zannyha was able to enjoy the experience completely. "I just felt joy and happiness the whole time," she says. "It was considered a high-risk pregnancy because I was 35 and what had happened before. But everything went fine." Gabriella was born in February 2007.

"I've loved every minute of being a mother," says Zannyha. "You hear people complaining about their kids, about getting up in the night, about flus and vomiting. But if you have trouble having a baby, you cherish every minute."

Source: http://www.babycenter.com

WAIT

By Russell Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, i cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
And the Master so gently said, "Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.

"My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.

'You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
and Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry;
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
As my Master replied again, "Wait"
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

I could give all you seek and pleased you will be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't  know Me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me.
When darkness and silence are all you can see.

You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of my comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you.

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still...Wait"

Source: www.donnarosestewart.com

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